How is it that some people just forget to take their brains with them some places? As some of you probably know already, today I found out some quite disturbing news that has troubled me deeply.
Recently, a church was broken into, vandalized, and set on fire in a town near where I live. I hadn't given it much thought at the time because it's happened before, I figured it was just a stupid hate crime. However, this morning that thought came to slap me right in the face. At 7:05 this morning, I recieved a phone call from my friend who we'll call Jill. This is quite unusual as we generally just talk in person because she lives right across the street. So I knew this was important. I answered and heard news that shocked me. I was apalled. It turns out that one of my very dear friends had done those things to this church that I hold very dear to me.
At first, I was just in a state of shock. I didn't know what to think about what had happened. As I was talking about it to my seminary teacher, a girl in my class asked me what was wrong with me that I would LET my friend do something like this. (To be quite honest I wanted to slap her right across the face but I didn't) As I let myself ponder about what had happened I had a feeling of deep sorrow come across me. So I cried as I was driving between schools. Then I got to school and started talking to Jane. We were talking about what had happened and I began to get very angry. I can't believe that someone I trusted with my life would do something so disrespectful to something I hold so close to my heart. I wonder what he could have possibly been thinking to do something so horrid. The thought of him seriously disgusts me right now. I'll never be able to look at him in the same way again. I don't understand why he would do something like this. And I really want to know. Not only has he ruined the close relationship I had with him but as he is now a legal adult he will be tried as an adult. He faces at least 3 felony charges. Which could turn into 4 because he assisted a minor.
I guess the thing that makes me most angry is the vandalism he placed everywhere. To me, placing an upside down crucifix anywhere is incredibly sacreligious. Not only that but it hurts me to know that he would do something like this after just barely taking this religion as his own because of me.
Is it wrong of me to hate him right now? I'm so upset just thinking about it. I know that Jesus said to forgive.. but I can't right now. Can I be mad now and forgive later?
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6 comments:
I see why you are angry here. I would say to you, and to make it short, that it is sometimes so hard to forgive. But think about it this way maybe...what if they changed? Started over? You could forgive them then, couldn't you?
Then why not now?
I was talking to someone who I respect a lot about it and he suggested I write a letter to him and ask him all my questions and let him know how I feel about what's going on so that's what I'm going to do. Most of my anger is gone now. I just think he did something incredibly stupid. And he ruined basically his whole life because of it.
Your right.
One stupid moment of idiocy, one stupid choice, and that's how someone wants to waste their life? Well, needless to say, he must be punished...I can't say I want him to get out of it. That only encourages more of the same and even worse behavior.
I hope I didn't offend you. Again if you need anything let me know.
Spencer
You are the second person who I know that knew the guy who did that.
My heart goes out to you. I can not imagine being in your shoes. I understand your anger right now, but I think you will need to forgive him. He needs all the friends and their support that he can get right now. Sure, he made a huge mistake, one that will change his life drastically forever, but he still needs love and support.
But again, your anger is totally understandable, and rather expected. Just don't let it take over you life, Kay?
Righteous anger never turns into hate, but into resolve to stop evil.
My bishop suggested I write to him while he's at wherever he is..
Just curious, who's the other person you know who knew him? Was it Ksenia?
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